Shoup Airlines

Give Me A Brake!

We’ve spent the last three weeks learning how to leave both a paper and electronic trail whilst performing maintenance on a Blackhawk. It has been interesting to some degree. The paper side is a nightmare as you would think and the electronic side is only in its second version so there are still a few bugs floating around but it beats the paper trail in most respects.

First, we simulated write-ups (broken things) to practice the trails. One would think you’d mix the problems up to see not only different problems but different corrective actions as well as not making class so tedious. Not here at the US Army School for Aviation Mechanics! I cannot count how many times I have pseudo-replaced the left or right main landing gear (MLG) brake! And to make matters even more painless, the paper version takes about 10 pages EACH time. The electronic version isn’t much different.

This week we finally hit the floor and went hands on, focusing on the MLG. First task? Hey, what a surprise, it’s that stupid frellin’ MLG brake!! Replace it. Next day, task at hand, break down a MLG brake and inspect it. Woohoo! Yesterday, I came in expecting to forge a new brake from raw materials. I was wrong. We got to disassemble and reinstall the tailwheel. Thank God, I was beginning to the Blackhawk was strictly made of MLG brakes.

Today, we had out test on the Landing Gear System. The written portion only had 20 questions on the MLG brakes. That was out of 30. I know you won’t be able to guess what the hands on portion contained. Yup, the upper shock strut and drag beam assembly. Oh wait, that’s what I wanted to work on. No, we were tested on replacement of a MLG brake and all associated write-ups!

I can now remove, disassemble, inspect, clean, assemble, and replace a MLG brake, right or left (there IS a difference) with my eyes closed and hands chained behind my back while sleeping upside down in a vat of burning oil and no tools readily available. I’m glad this block was labeled Landing Gear System, because there aren’t any other components included in it like, I don’t know, the MLG tire and wheel assembly, shock struts (upper and lower), drag beams, tailwheels, tail wheel lock pins or actuators, tail wheel shock strut, etc, etc…

Can anyone tell me why a helicopter even needs brakes?!? (Come on, think about it…)

Goodnight, Sweetheart

It’s with great pleasure that I announce the turning in YET AGAIN of my M16. Apparently enough of us complained that the higher ups actually listened and did something about it. Then again, now that I think about it, sleeping with my M16 was the only action I’d been getting of late!

Originally, the company would issue rifles to a platoon two weeks before going out on their FTX. Then about two weeks before we got here someone decided how great an idea it would be to issue everyone weapons, WITH 5 BLANKS!!! YEAH!!! The rule says, “you should never be more than an arm’s length from your weapon.” Now picture working on your car, but wait, your car is the size of Big Foot and you have to constantly climb all over it with your M16. Fun stuff!

Oh, but it gets better! The grand stupid one (whoever he/she may be) decided that any time one was outside you were to lock and load. Yes, we were marching around with a frellin’ round chambered! The day that decree came down I wondered who, not if, there would be a negligent discharge. Surprisingly, no one pulled the trigger for two weeks, until the day before final weapons turn in.

See, we sling our weapons across our backs whenever we head to the DFAC (dining facility). Many think it’s funny to switch your fire selector from ‘SAFE’ to ‘SEMI’ or even ‘AUTO’ while standing in line behind you. Of course most of us immediately check our rifles as soon as we leave the DFAC, but some don’t. And that is how the poor sap ended up doing Iron Mikes* across the field for an hour after he suddenly discovered (the hard way) that his rifle was on full automatic.

So it is with a fond farewell that I kiss that weapon and all its stupid rules goodbye until I go on FTX.

*Iron Mike – Forward knee lunges with your M16 held over your head

Inside the Vendetta

I can’t think of a better way to celebrate my first weekend off post than with a movie review! And a two-fer at that! I suppose one could do a pub review but we’re not allowed to drink…um, yeah. Strangely enough, both movies focus around Nazi actions dating back to WWII. Coincidence? Maybe not… Anyway, I took 4 guys with me and taught them the ways of movie hopping.

First off, I’d like to thank Judd for the quick movie rundown. His “Movie Guy” voice was a bit lacking, but he still provided the info needed for someone who’s been living under a rock for nearly four months! If you’re looking for a quick synopsis on a Friday night, call him at 714-555-5043.

At the plate and looking to swing away is Inside Man with Denzel Washington and Clive Owens. I’ll be honest, Judd said Denzel and I was ready to move on, his movies keep getting more cookie cutterish it seems. Then he drops Owens’ name and that piqued my interest. So this guy (Owens), who seems to change accents at the drop of a hat, has planned what seems to be the perfect bank heist. You get to find out whether he pulls it off or Denzel and his inept crew of NYPD cops head Owens off at the pass.

Spike Lee unravels the story in a type of piece meal fashion that is difficult to follow at times but still leaves a catchable drift. And what would a Spike Lee joint be without the race card thrown in for good measure? Owens’ character is excellently written and portrayed as a dark, perfectly calculating and patient thief on par with Robert De Niro’s character in Heat. The ending seems to lack that final oomph though to push the movie into the great category, but it’s still a good cat and mouse flic.

On deck is V for Vendetta with Natalie Portman and Hugo Weaving. Based on a comic book (graphic novel for those still in denial), this story is set in a present day Britain where the Nazis won WWII and encapsulated England in a 1984-ish society with everyone looking over their shoulder, most religions and interests oppressed and the government controlling the media.

Enter Hugo Weaving as the dashing, cape wearing, acrobatic flying, do-gooder that plays a Guy Fawkes type hero to the nines including a Fawkes mask that he NEVER takes off. Natalie Portman stumbles in as the unwilling sidekick with a past she doesn’t want to embrace but must to survive. Together, these two attempt to bring down a dictatorship headed by John Hurt in good ol’ televised revolution style.

Interesting ‘what if’ story once you get past a bit of Bush bashing that had absolutely nothing to do with the film. I almost thought I was watching a Michael Moore film for a second, but remembered this was a Wachowski Bros. production (The Matrix Saga) so you can understand some of the incorporated strangeness.

Nevertheless, a decent story that felt like it left out some important back stories or could have delved more deeply into the characters that surrounded the story. I’m sure the comic..er…graphic novel does just that, it’s just a shame the film couldn’t. Lot of potential left untouched there, plus it leaves the movie a bit patchy. As a result, I only recommend this one to sci-fi or alternate history fans as others will be left wondering ‘why’ the whole time, very much like the second and third installments of the Matrix Trilogy.