God Bless those civilians and their minivans!
15.May.2006Oh the fun you will have when you spend every bloody minute with a bunch of 21 year olds! I literally am living the freshman year of college I never had. And the jury is still out on whether that’s a good or bad thing. We knew it was going to be a damn the torpedos type of weekend only because we HAD to make up for last weekend’s lockdown. What pushed it into ludicrous speed was our PT test on Friday morning. I don’t think anyone expected to do anywhere near as well as they did on this vampire schedule, but it appears to have helped. I’m improved to 20 points from a perfect score and I didn’t even try all that hard on the run!
Anyway, so what would a bunch of legal age kids full of spit and vinegar do on a Friday afternoon? Well, first they’d get rid of the spit and vinegar! Why anyone would carry around spit or vinegar is beyond me. Where was I? Ah yes, these boys would then grab their two older and devilishly handsome chaperones and go to the mall. Yeah, that’s the ticket, the mall!
Amazingly, this mall serves Mexican food and drink. Large quantities of food and drink. Excellent food and drink. We remained there all day. In fact, we almost missed our recall formation at 10pm. This would not have been good.
Now, most of you are rolling your eyes and tsk-tsking us (trust me, I know you), but it wasn’t our fault. We called the cabs an hour prior, they just decided to show up at the wrong Mexican restaur…er…mall, yeah. Even after the correction, they never showed up. So out of the kindness of their hearts, several patriotic civilians returned us to the fort. I didn’t know a minivan could do 0 to 60 in under 7 seconds. I really should have wondered when she told us all to lean hard as she banked to the right.
With a minute thirty left to spare we bolted out the van and up three flights of stairs right in front of the entire company. All 300 of them! Minus the Drill Sergeants of course. We changed and made formation by the skin of our teeth.
First question out of my mouth (after catching my breath, of course), ‘so what we doin’ tomorrow night?’
Buried in Basic Training | 6 Village Idiots have spoken




I am deeply hurt that you don’t remember what a minivan can do!
Blurted out by CONN – 21.May.2006
It wasn’t by chance a white Canadian minivan, was it? It sure sounds like Connelly’s driving to me.
Blurted out by Sersa – 23.May.2006
Sadly, I don’t think I ever witnessed any of Connelly’s so-called minivan driving. Although I have some minivan stories of my own.
The only minivan story I remember is the Westrup Shotgun Incident. Still pretty damn funny.
Blurted out by Shoup – 26.May.2006
I totally forgot about that. That was pretty freaking hilarious. Now you can see that anyone with a minivan, “your going to get an adventure”. Nough said.
Blurted out by CONN – 26.May.2006
what was the Westrup Shotgun incident?? i don’t recal that exactly. Help me refesh my memory??
but, hey canadian minivan driving i do remember!! best days of our lifes? (am i getting old that i would say that?)
btw, Ben is still waiting for your call, last i checked!! 757-270-3843
Blurted out by scotto – 31.May.2006
For some reason I can’t edit your comment Scotto, so when all the weirdos start calling Ben, make sure you let him know it’s because you plastered his phone number on the net.
I haven’t called him yet because of my odd schedule. Doesn’t leave much time to talk to the people who live on the normal side of the clock. But his time is coming soon. Don’t worry.
And the Shotgun incident will get it’s own posting here since it seems to have gotten everyone curious.
Blurted out by Shoup – 3.Jun.2006