Shoup Airlines

The Elements of Style

One of the “rituals” around here is taming the wild beast that is emergency procedures or EPs.  Every aircraft has them and every business that operates aircraft put their own spin on them.  Some need to be memorized verbatim because your actions are time critical, others may just require that you understand the problem as you pull out a reference checklist or handbook in an attempt to remedy the situation.

The chief complaint amongst pilots has and will always be how the EP is written.  We’re a logic driven bunch but the operating manuals are written by technical writers with more often than not a lawyer acting as their editor.  You end up with atrociously butchered sentences and paragraphs that need to be memorized but do not flow in your head whatsoever.

The doors will not be intentionally moved from the fully open or closed position in flight.  The cabin doors may be opened or closed during hovering flight.  The cabin doors must be closed or fully opened and latched before forward flight.  Should the door inadvertently open in flight, it may be secured fully opened or closed.

If one or more droop stops do not go in during rotor shutdown, shut down an engine to lower rotor idling RPM in an attempt to seat the droop stop.  If the droop stop still does not go in, accelerate the rotor to above 75% RPM R.  Repeat rotor shutdown procedures slightly displacing cyclic in an attempt to dislodge the droop stop.  If the droop stop still does not go in, make sure the rotor disc area is clear of personnel and proceed with normal shutdown procedures keeping the cyclic in neutral position.

One of my favorites…

Collective – Adjust only enough to begin a descent with power remaining applied to the main transmission throughout the descent and landing.

I’m sure it will come to you as no surprise that the Army EXCELS at things like the above.  Uncle Sam has an extremely healthy relationship with the word practicable which I had never seen used before.  Everyone else just used practical.  These EPs would make both Strunk and White not only roll over in their graves but decide to give up English altogether and haunt another language’s grammar and usage.

But Sammy doesn’t leave bad enough alone.  No, we had to take a test today on the 60′s EPs and you were docked points for forgetting parentheses, commas, dashes, capitalization of certain words and abbreviation of others.  Because you know, if you omit that slight pause in the middle of the emergency engine shutdown in flight procedure you’re doomed!

Looking Back

I’m not one that tends to jump on the bandwagon, as most of you know.  In fact, I usually tend to be the one that jumps off and starts running the other way until I find a canoe and start paddling.  On the asphalt.  Uphill.  But during lunch today I got a quick glimpse of the news channels doing their 9/11 retrospects and it got me to thinking about a couple of the anniversaries.

9/11/01 - I remember the morning much like everyone else does.  Vividly.  I had just been hired by the airline and was home in California enjoying a training break.  My mother, who was leaving for work, woke me up to mention that a plane had crashed into a building in New York.  I rolled back over thinking it was an unfortunate accident that would give general aviation another black eye.   Of course, when I got up about an hour later and turned the tv on, I was gravely mistaken.  I had planned to fly back to DC the same day and what I discovered later was that I had listed myself on what would have been United flight 175′s next leg.

A week later when they lifted the flight bans, I was able to get back to DC but had to go through JFK.  I haven’t been around long enough to say it with complete conviction, but I know flying over the devastation that morning will be one of, if not THE most somber and poignant moment in my life.

9/11/02 – A year later, everyone was paranoid of whether lightning would strike twice.  I was positive it couldn’t, but that didn’t really amount to a hill of beans.  I was a line pilot at that point with a regular schedule.  We started the day in Akron of all places and I remember one of the newly minted TSA agents giving us all Never Forget pins.  I knew I wanted to fly on the 11th, going so far as to bid lines strictly with flying that day if only just to give a giant middle finger in defiance.  What I got was more than I could have asked for.  I got to fly into New York.  It wasn’t downtown, but going into White Plains allowed us to fly right along the island for a view.  With one passenger.

The next couple years were hit or miss on whether I got to fly the fateful anniversary.  Then I was furloughed and the flying really dwindled.  Life continued, people moved on but the events still sit nestled in the back of your mind like a lost love.

9/11/08 – I find it only mere coincidence, but it is interesting to start class for the Blackhawk today.  Nothing special happened, no earth shattering ponderance on life or anything like that.  Just that same quasi-excitement anyone gets when starting class.  You’re eager to start, but at the same time bummed to lose your free time.  And yet, during lunch it seemed like my immature side was now giving both middle fingers because during that moment of fleeting defiance it finally felt like I was chipping the smallest bit away from that complete and utter helplessness we all felt seven years ago.

Admin Note

Not sure what happened with the YouTube post below. There’s a bug somewhere in that specific video as all others still work. So I found another way to post it. The video should be working now, if not I apologize and you can see the original link here.